this may or may or may not enhance your reading pleasure :
the brilliants of my illness out shines my intellect.
i wanted to go out and sit under clouds and watch birds go by, but i cannot move.
i have never been so tried and energetic, my brain does not know pause, but my body is lifeless.
i wanna smell mountain air and walk in the trees, but a simpler task would be to move mountains.
each step i take is different, but each thought is the same, i will not make it like this.
all i want is piece/peace of mind/mine, but no peace is coming for me and none is sort.
i wanna sit under a tree and watch days go by, but i cannot move.
i need help to silence these inaudible screams and rest for a while, i just wanna rest for a while.
my days are labored and i know numbered, i can’t feel my heart anymore.
i just wanna sit in the rain and count raindrops, i wanna feel my wet skin as it dries in mountain air. i wanna touch the sky and not have it fall on me.
my time spent in unfriendly company has left me no tomorrow and tonight is to long, i have been used up and no one checks up on me.
i can hear my clock counting down, but i won’t be ready when it stops.
i just wanna sit on the steps of my life and watch the cars go by.
i wanna be seen by people who are not like me, finally be seen. being alone is to much work and i have never been so tired.
this has become to much for me, oh god am i tired and how long is long enough, oh god am i tired.